Courtyard: White Tower, Tar Valon

Before you stands a magnificent palace made of delicately sculpted marble, rather than blocks. Gently arching walls and bulging domes rise high into the sky, seemingly just barely touching the clouds with its delicately crafted spires, topping off the breathtaking sight before you. Looking about, one can see a small garden off to the side, with a small winding path down it's center that leads into a maze of bushes where one might get lost if not

Colors seem to change from bright pastels to earthy tones and vibrant reds as the days start to grow colder and the days shorter. There are several benches about the grounds where one might be able to sit and relax. There are several lamps about the courtyard lighting the way for those that would travel through the grounds late at night. Several of the Tower Guards can be   seen keeping an eye on the gates and patrolling the grounds

A broad stairway, made of pristine white marble, enters into the White Tower, marked by a massive pair of doors decorated with delicate carvings of intricate workmanship. A tall, white wall cascades around the yard, its entrances and exits marked by high gates leading to the street, watched by the Tower Guard. Somewhere in the courtyard you can see buildings for the barracks and the stables. You can also see an entrance to the practice yard, marked of by a row of high hedges.

Relovic, Kelsyn, Aaron, Kradan, Dallarius, Meeko

"Dead," comes Dallarius' clipped response to Kalsyn's question. "Eight years past a Darkfriend did something to her mind. She lived, but her mind did not function for four years. Kept her in the Borderlands, trying to heal her and finish our work. She died four years back, she was the last to go. Marc and the others had already fallen. "Trivan bows to those near and quietly, as is his way in such gatherings, makes his way inside muttering something to Emrys about needing to get in there before all the good places are taken.

Kradan is sitting on a bench somewhere. Face emotionless as he holds the Void. Leaning forward on his knees and watches the courtyard.

Relovic stands beneath some trees nearby Aaron. He silently watches the two gaidin talk about dead Sedai.

Aaron stands near Relovic with his head lowered, his posture relaxed around the man. He simply watches the dark sky, enjoying the weather.

Grunting, Kelsyn nods his head respectively to Dallarius. "I am sorry to hear about your loss. I'm sure she was well tended in her Last Embrace." The Gaidin speaks nothing of his own Sedai, former or present.

"I question my return," Dallarius admits quietly, his cold eyes watching the courtyard. "But I knew of no other place to go to find anything resembling a desire to live."

"I know some of what you mean. I lost Vanessa that first year. I didn't return for some many years. I found solace in the Blight, or as close as one can fighting naught by the Dark One's creatures." Kelsyn grunts, pushing a stray lock of blonde hair out of his eyes. That ice blue gaze of his is piercing. "Why I survived, or how, I still do not know. And further, I've been twice bonded since then..." His voice trails off as he mentions that particular topic. He had thought he found what he wanted in his bond to Atalanta, but... things change.

Meeko walks into the courtyard, eyeing everything she can. She can be heard muttering softly "Where is pretty boy? That fool guard must have snuck out to visit that domini in town." she continues to walk slowly toward the gate when she spots Kradan and heads in his directions. Just maybe he has seen her guard Keats.

"None will bond me," says Dallarius, shaking his head slightly. "Shara's last thought was for me to return here to find healing, but it is not to be had in this place. I remain simply from loyalty to the Tower, though I believe the Tower will watch my fall into madness without batting an eyelash. I sometimes think I would be better in the Blight, but then after two decades there it's started to feel like home." And being from Saldaea, it was never far from home to begin with.

Emotion floods Kradan's face as he smiles and looks over to Meeko, "Hello Meeko." He says as he stands up smoothly and bows.

Relovic glances idly towards Meeko as she wanders into the yard. He nods politely, whether or not she notices him, and then passes his gaze over the courtyard looking for something to catch his attention.

Aaron does note Meeko, and although not looking pleased, he does nod with a slight smile.

"I nearly ended my life, a few times, before I was bonded the second. She died, or a part of her did. She had an accident which left me as wretched as Vanessa's death." Kelsyn states, the ice in his eyes turning glacial. "The Keeper had to bond me without my permission to ensure that I would live. It is one that I continue to tolerate, even though I have a choice in the matter." Honorbound, likely, he feels to serve the woman who saved him. He had not wanted to die then anymore than he had before.

"I began to end mine last night, but Sionil Sidai stopped me with more empty words," says Dallarius in the same cold tone. "I will not last much longer. I have given the Tower the chance Shara will rest easy with. Another week, perhaps two, and I will again seek death in the Blight. I do not wish to die, I do not wish to live either. At least death will end the pain."

Grunting, Kelsyn shrugs his shoulders. "Bonding does not fill the void left by the other. It merely offers another to be kept and tampered with later." Having lost two bonds, he speaks from experience. "I still wonder at the sanity of my decision to stay with Micana Sedai. Yet, I do. I am a detriment to her health." He grunts further, eyes glancing out over the court. "Yet, she will not listen to me."

"But if you give in to Death, do you not let it win, just like it won when taking your Sedai." comments Relovic from his arbor haven. His arms are crossed over his chest and he leans back against a trunk, gazing lazily at the two Gaidin.

Meeko nods to Relovic and Aaron, then heads to Kradan with a smile on her face.

"I am glad that we caught up with each other Kradan, I have a message from Tizy." Ah Maria, making sure Meeko is kept updated while she is stuck in the Tower. "She is well and very excited about her reading and is anxious to show you the next you can come to visit her." Meeko again scans the courtyard and particularly the gate "Kradan have you seen my guard Keats? I fear that pretty one has wondered off to see that Domini shopkeeper." she does not seem to pleased and hopes she is wrong about her guard.

Dallarius glances briefly towards Relovic, then back over to Kelsyn. "Then there is no hope for those such as us?"

Relovic shrugs slightly and comments again, "I thought that warders fought the endless battle always. Perhaps I was wrong but then I do not know what you have lost." A wry chuckle, "I don't even know what I have lost. So take what wisdom from my words as you will."

"Vanessa's death was the same year that we left the Tower." Kelsyn states, his eyes briefly going to Relovic at the other man's words. He looks at the golden-eyed consort quietly, studying him. Yet, he continues to speak to Dallarius, even as his gaze then shifts to Aaron. "As far as hope, there is only that which you create."

Kradan nods slight with a grin, "That’s good." Tilting his head slightly and lets his smile fade, "Keats... No I haven't seen him... What new shop?" Gaze slowly slides over to the two Gaidin and he shivers, asking in a bare whisper to Meeko, "Is that the price from failure?"

"Then there is nothing," says Dallarius, nodding his head once. "Thank you, Kelsyn."

Meeko's attention goes momentarily to the golden-eyed one and nods at his comment. She snaps back around as Kradan speaks "Oh the shop, nor the owner are new but Keats met the owner for the first time and she dared to eye his *assets*. I know he is a pretty one but I, well I asked him to remain around here in case I needed him." she nods again to Kradan's question "Yes to many that is the price I am afraid."

Aaron shrugs and decides to go see if he can get a good mug of ale. He slowly walks away.

Kelsyn smirks. "Only if there's nothing to set your sights on." He shrugs his shoulders and grunts. He looks to the Tower briefly, then speaks in an apologetic tone. "She comes. I do not want to be here when she does." Kelsyn and Micana have the oddest of relationships. He avoids her as much as possible, perhaps trying to prevent getting as close to her as he was with the other two.

Dallarius nods his head, "Good day to you then," he says coldly to Kelsyn. He makes no response regarding finding hope, instead letting his steps move him towards the grass.

Kradan nods his head slowly and emotions wash from his face as the Void encases his mind. "I'm sorry. I don't know where your guard is." He answers and bows slightly again and sits down on the bench.

Turning abruptly, Kelsyn makes his way to the barracks, without further word or ado.

Meeko looks a bit puzzled as the emotion washes from Kradan's face. She knows the look from Kirill, the void. She simply nods to him and goes about looking for her guard. She will most definitely have to find out what drove him back to the void sometime.

Dallarius glances briefly to Meeko. He never really did get a 'thank you' from her, but he doesn't care enough to make an issue of it. Instead he slowly wipes the blade with his rag, cold eyes watching.

Relovic watches Kelsyn leave and Dallarius go on to cleaning the blade singlemindedly. Noting the boy lost to emotion and the lady who was talking with him, Relovic decides on simply retiring for the night. Standing back and watching takes a lot out of a man after all.

Meeko spots the man with the golden eyes, she walks over to him first "Master Relovic, how are you this evening?" she is being cordial as she can but is still very uncomfortable here at the Tower.

Dallarius's cold gaze bores into Meeko's back for a moment or three, then with that glare still active he begins polishing his blade with more... vigor. After a few moments of this he rolls to his feet and slings the blade back into its sheath, walking towards the Gates. Had about enough of the Tower, it might seem.

Relovic halts his egress and turns to face Meeko. "Greetings Milady Meeko, I am doing fine this evening. And yourself? Finding the Tower to your liking?" The last is said as if he knows full well she isn't.

Kradan watches the courtyard with distant interest. Settling his gaze on Dall and blinks slowly and slides off the bench and follows, "Gaidin Dallarius are you free?" He asks softly as he closes in.

"What?" Dallarius asks with frost in his voice as he turns towards the boy.

Meeko shrugs "It is tolerable and I can at least rest here from all that is going on in town." she notices Dallarius and points to him "Do you know that mans name?" she never found out the name of the one at the Grove that horrible nite that brought her to be stuck at the Tower until she can see the Amryln. 

Kradan blinks slowly again and bows slightly, "I was wondering if you teach me forms." He asks softly. 

"No," snaps Dallarius in that winter-kissed voice. "I am going to the Blight."

Kradan tilts his head slightly and asks plainly, "Why?" Voice just slightly above a whisper. 

Relovic hmms softly and thinks back, "I believe the other one called him Dallarius. He seems to have problems with living." He shakes his head sadly as he looks to the warder. 

Remembering how she felt when Kirill left her, Meeko sighs "I can understand that but one must find something positive to go on living for." she looks back to Dallarius as he snaps "Maybe I should go over and speak to him."

"Beg the Light, boy," says Dallarius, turning his gaze back towards the gate, "Beg the Light that you /never/ learn the answer to that question. Beg that you die when your Ward dies."

"It might be best," Relovic mentions to Meeko. "It is sad to see someone loose themselves so..."

Meeko nods and walks over to Dallarius "Master Dallarius do you need someone to speak with, someone who is not a part of this place?" she remains controlled "I am a bit concerned knowing how devastating it is to loose a mate." She can only offer as a good Sage would.

Kradan nods his head slowly, ever so slowly. "I will never become a Gaidin, Gaidin Dallarius if I do not learn. Why leave? Death Gaidin Dallarius is the final step, giving up." He whispers softly, voice grows cold. Though no where as cold as Dallarius, "I need a teacher... and... I wish to learn from you...." He trails off and glances to Meeko and quietly steps back.

Dallarius turns his gaze from the gate - and his attention from Kradan - to face Meeko. And damn those eyes are cold. His voice is even colder, "A mate?" he asks. He shakes his head slightly, "Far, far from it, Ambassador. I lost half my soul, and returned to find nothing to aid me here. The desire for life is gone, the desire for death is gone. Desire is gone. Nothing save coldness with the occasional flicker of warmth." 

Relovic stays where he was when talking with Meeko. Turned towards the group he watches silently, wondering if he can offer any advice to the despondent Gaidin. 

Meeko does not turn from the gaze "I am sure one can find a reason to go on. You will find a way to continue if you really want. I know, from what Morcath has told me about the bondings, how big your loss can be, but I also know many have come through it well and if your half the man I saw at the Grove the other night, you shock me that you do not try." Her voice quite controlled and those dark eyes remain steady on Dallarius, not much intimidates Meeko.

"There is nothing," says Dallarius with a slight shrug. "Nothing to hope for, nothing to dream for. I am too old now, Gaidin with youth and looks are sought over those with scarred souls and shattered dreams."

Meeko shakes her head "there is life outside of being a Gaidin. You are well trained and the city guards need a Captain, why not put your experience to work to help others instead of feeling sorry for yourself, like a child."

Relovic nods to himself, seeing that the Sage has it as well in hand as it can be considering the subject. With that he turns and exits into the Tower.

Relovic walks up the steps and goes through the main doors of the Tower.

Dallarius snorts, "You know nothing of the Gaidin if you believe that, or truly think you have any idea what it is to loose a Ward. Nothing."

Kradan folds his arms softly and watches calmly. Piping up suddenly, "Anything like losing your entire village. Family, friends,... Wife to be?" He whispers softly, eye's narrowed slightly.

Meeko shakes her head "It is not nothing but it *is* something you can get over if you wanted." she nods to Kradan and his response. "Well Gaidin if you change your mind about living and finding a reason to go on for your ward, to keep her name alive in the hearts of others, come speak to me at the Council chambers or my shop and I will aid you in finding a suitable position for your skills."

"Boy," says Dallarius, looking to Kradan at his words, "loosing friends and loved ones is traumatic, I do not begrudge that. But feeling inside /yourself/ their death, feeling the pain leading up to it, feeling that sense of fear and shock as they slip away from life... and feeling your soul itself die with them. That is loosing a Ward, boy." He then looks to Meeko, "None have offered aid that would do any good, m'lady."

Meeko shrugs "Well I just have and the rest is up to you. Like I said you can run off and wallow as a child or you can stand strong and show the world you are doing this for your bond. If it were me I would want to keep the memory of my bond alive." she covers a yawn "I am sorry but I must get some rest, it has been a pleasure speaking with both of you." Meeko turns, after taking a final glance at the gates for her guard, and heads to the kitchen gardens.

Kradan nods his head slowly, "So run to the Blight and die then? That’s the answer?" He asks faintly. His grasp on the void flickers. Is it really worth the price?

Dallarius's hand goes right to his sword, whipping it out with a grace that's damn near frightening. The man knows how to kill, if nothing else. Those cold eyes flicker between Meeko and Kradan as if wondering who to kill first, then they settle on Kradan, "Draw a weapon, boy."

Kradan lose whatever hold he had on the Void as his hands shakily grasp the hilt of his sword and draws it slowly. "Why?" He asks softly as his sword clears its sheath and settles the tip on the ground.

Wynn wanders in from one of the gates and looks around for a moment.

"Because I am going to kill you," says Dallarius in that cold, cold voice. "The woman is a diplomat, you, however want to be Gaidin. Then be Gaidin, boy. Back your cold words with a blade."

Wynn blinks as bits of words waft in her direction and she curious heads towards the group.

Kradan raises his blade up and lets the Void encase his mind again, "I'm not Boy. Gaidin Dallarius..." Letting his sword tip lower again and stares defiantly at Dall, "I will not fight you." He whispers faintly.

"Drop the sword or die, boy, I don't care which," says the dark blade master. Kradan folds his arms and holds his ground. Letting his blade clatter to the ground, locking his gaze with the Gaidins and waits.

"Love or a Bond, boy," says Dallarius in that cold voice, "That is all that remains for a Gaidin whose Ward is dead. People speak of hope all they wish, but the words mean nothing." His blade spins and slides home in its sheath.

Wynn listens to the words from not too far away, but stays silent for the moment, watching the dark one introspectively.

Meeko stops dead in her tracks as she hears the sword and spins around to see if Kradan needs assistance. Hearing the words of Dallarius she nods in silences and vanishes into the Garden.

"Why not bond then?" Kradan asks softly, "Or find someone to love? Die and...Your gift to world dies too... Why?" Ok, Kradan is dense.

You open the gate and walk through to the kitchen garden.